loh my gosh life just keeps going. Observation week at work, clothes war over a Christmas outfits. Cat refused to take pics with Santa. heartbreak. I did tell her last year she didn’t have to this year. Darn my word.

Two days before Christmas Frank’s bday on the 23rd Vodka Snapple strw/kiwi, He invited everyone over last minute like at 4pm for a 7pm pizza and pie party bc he just hadn’t decided what he wanted to do. eye roll Good thing I spent the entire day before cleaning like the good wife I am.

Christmas Eve Cucumber Vodka and Lemonade at my sister’s, Two hours before leaving Addie says her head itches a lot... Yup that was fun! I took care of the problem right then and there. (I wonder if my family read this) Our gift to you lol!!!

Christmas day at my childhood BFF Sister in law’s (vodka and apple Snapple), then the highly anticipated Cat’s Queen of the day 12th bday. Breaking all tradition yet again, she didn’t want birthday pancakes and only wanted to spend time with her sleepover friend IVY. It gave me time to put everything Christmas away. Not fast enough. (Ssymbols of grief gone) Door Dash Chick-fil-a at request. After an hour of deliberating, Catalina decided she wanted me to drive her, her friend, and Addie to Urban Air. Anything inside on your day and gladly to be near you. Frank went to the ranch. Cat seemed to be happy I was there to entertain them with my banter. We stopped and shopped real quick for three dressy sweatshirts bc she’s the sporty type. Lubys was her choice for dinner, for Ivy’s never been and we were all amazed at that. Finally, Cat picked a funky cheese cake encased with gram crust on top and bottom to celebrate and sing happy birthday. It was a nice day to have a baby 12 years ago. I am blessed. Life doesn’t stop there.

More driving to practice, The weekend brings Addie’s morning vball tourney. 7:20am on the court. Coach’s mtg 7:30. We tied for first and points pushed us to third. Bummer! Girls had some amazing saves but more spooked ball falls. Not good volleyball. But they are 7-9yrs old playing 11us mere babies.

Two practices yesterday. New Yrs Eve at my sister’s in Bulverde. I’m going peppermint vodka tonight. No sipping just shots. I really just want home to stay in my new robe and pjs. I don’t like driving bk after midnight when I could be sleeping. But I will do it for my girls and my neices and nephews. Tomorrow there’s no sleeping in. It’s Dillard’s 50% off lowest mark down price annual shopping trip! Boots and comforters! A day for me and my money. and continue...

•Most stubborn? Cat when she wants something her way
•Most laid back? Addie is so chill
•Worst temper? Neither
•Most likely to share? Addie
• Eats the most? Cat loves food
•Who sleeps the longest? Cat her record is 1030
•Sneakiest? Cat but just to be funny
•Who is the loudest? Neither our house is pretty quiet
•Who is the shyest? Addie but only in public
•Who has the most attitude? My sassy Cat when she got the “adolescence”
•Who is the most dramatic? Neither Addie likes to pretend act drama
•Who talks the most? Cat but both are pretty reserved
•Who has mom’s personality? They both have parts: Addie is an introvert home body and Cat is determined and strong willed. All good things.
•Who is most likely to take care of me? Addie has better bedside manner but Cat wld too
•Who is likely to cause me to lose my mind? Neither they are good girls
Who makes me laugh the most? Both in their own way


I love them just the way they are ♥️

Today I had my first baby. She was so little and wanted only her momma. She didn’t want to be put down even in her sleep. She loved books and pushing furniture around. Showing off her strength still. Today she loves snap chat and selfies. She’s a National team captain and on Kindness club and Student Council. She enjoys school and being with family. She loves to antagonize her little sister but looks after her. She loves food and jeans. She’s a casual athletic type that makes us laugh with her quick wit. She can be sassy sarcastic one minute then sweet and silly then next. She’s definitely got the “adolescence.”

I wish she didn’t have to grow so fast. I wish I had more time to be near here. This thought makes me weep. But I must be grateful. She makes me appreciate every moment I am given with her. And she’s guiding me through this whole raising teenagers gig. I think I’m doing okay. I am trying my best. I will always be here for you Catalina. I will always be your Momma.

My girls were happy. My family is healthy. We love each other as best as we can. God has blessed me with the ability to love and strength to love others. I am grateful for that. Merry Christmas.

I feel I’ve been suppressing my feelings since a very young age. I have been practicing till there was no trace. I suspected that was normal, but I didn’t know that skill would save my life. Christmas is beyond hard when you are without. When the person who is suppose to be smiling back at you or offering a shoulder to lay your head is gone. If I acted on this pain, if I allowed it to surface even for a moment, I wouldn’t have a life, I wouldn’t be able to function for my kids. So I push it deep down and I clean and I wrap and I teach I do anything that helps me to not think and plaster a pretend smile while my heart is heavy with sadness. Loss doesn’t go away. You just get better at hiding it. But you know this already.

I’ve been wrapping by demand of my youngest, cleaning bc no one else does and cooking bc they ask to eat three times a day. Good thing I have plenty of chocolate to keep me going! This is the first day off with no need to leave the house for any reason. Wish I was relaxing like my girls or playing softball with my brothers in blue like Frank.

Cat’s team qualified for the tour! They came in second in the gold bracket taking Houston Revolution to three sets. I’m proud if my girl and her team!!

Tonight was Addie’s last softball game of the season. Addie with a 2RBI triple. She also made a double play. She really improved this season and looked happy on the field. She had some pretty amazing coaches!! It’s going to be really nice going from three sports to just two!

​I only raise ballers!!