I was allowed to come in late 20 minutes to work on Friday so I can see Addie perform. Not before I asked how many days have I been absent. I have been absent 5.5 days. This is the 25th week of school. I have never not once came in late. In fact. I get to school between 7:15-7:45am EVERY day. An hour early at times. I tutor till 4:30 once a week for eight weeks. Im released at 4. I have to work TWO weeks this summer. I'm asked to join two committees and give presentations over strategies. I stay till 600 for parent night. I missed my daughter's Kinder Thanksgiving feast. 100th day of school parade. All six class parties. I can only attend two out four field trips. I go to work sick bc I want to save my days for when my girls are sick or for her Kinder graduation. It is Addie's very first Kinder singing presentation. She's really nervous. I will be there even if I can't stay and tell her she did great job with a big hug and kiss. I have to run out of there to get to work. My students need me too. I will do it all.
It's difficult being the reserved person I am. I do my very best to smile and offer pleasant greetings, but I don't reach out and make small conversation. I firmly believe the less I say, the less ppl will judge me, but that is quite the opposite. I feel other people's judgement. I know they think I am too good to mk friends. They don't inquire about my life bc I don't ask about theirs. I guess they figure I don't care. Friday, Addie sings on stage from 8-8:20. I report to work at 8:15. Class doesn't start till 8:40 by the time announcements are over. I don't want to take the entire morning off for 20 minutes of tardiness. No one's doing any favors for me. I don't feel supported at work, and I think it's bc of my personality. They said I need to take off when I asked for cover. Why wld they try to help someone who keeps to themselves? I feel so torn. I want to be there for my daughter. Singing on stage is really hard for her and she wants me there, but I don't want admin to think I don't care about our early release STAAR review. I have some serious teacher mom guilt. I've missed so much of my daughter's school events already. It's weighing on me heavy. I know they know I'm a good teacher. That is one thing I am not worried about. I know I shouldn't feel guilty about choosing my daughter. I also know this could be easily resolved, but I am left to make a choice. And I hate it.
We decided to go BIG for Cat's 10th bday. Cat and her BFFS had a joint dance emoji party. We three moms rented out an event hall and invited all the girls. We figured all their friends were the same from CYO teams. We got ju ju on that beat. I LOVED seeing them dance. I know life is going to change soon for my sweet innocent girl. I'm glad we pulled it off. It was AWESOME! It was a party to remember. So grateful for our circle of friends.
I LOVE that I am REQUIRED to read on the job and DEMAND others to read! So far this year I have read:
Adoration on Jenna Fox (3x since I have three classes)
Midsummer Night's Dream 3x
The Boy in the Striped Pajamas
Touching Spirit Bear 3x
Two more books to go for my students. By the end if the year they will have read EIGHT books!
I saw Willie Nelson perform tonight at the rodeo. I was worried he wouldn't mk till today. Thankful he did. Very cool!
Addie had her first Zone playoff game. They were fourth place playing first place and knock them out. Sat we played for first and second in Zone. There were only six girls playing a team of nine. We had not beat this team all season. First quarter we were down 2-0. Second quarter Addie made a shot 2-2. It reminded that way till the end. My sweet girl was so tired. She kept looking at me when she wld go from defense to offense. 4th quarter TWO seconds left. Inbound stack play under the basket. Her cousin Katie inbounded the ball to her! She shot made the basket. Buzzer went off. The crowd went wild!!! Everyone rushed the court. It was an AMAZING experience! I know my dad was there. ZONE CHAMPS! I was sooo proud to be her Momma and her coach. Onto City playoffs.
Dancing on my own Calvin Scott
It's a choice to wake up happy. Not an easy one but still a choice you own