Today’s my mom’s 72th bday. Here are some pics of her celebration today and prob all week. Her children wanted to see her but she’s out living it up. I’m glad she’s happy. Life sure has changed.

so the plan is to put our house on the market in May. Build a 900sqft ranch cabin and pay off utilities on our property. Build the big house in a year or two or never. I’m excited. I used to live in a cabin but never with my own park outside. And my girls will be closer to me.

Keeping in mind that there is no Arizona if my past is correct.

It’s a shame you chose the wrong one.

Just me and my big girl. I miss Addie already, but she has softball games. So it begins splitting our girls games and parents.

It’s happened. I cried when I got the phone call. I was in my PLC grade level mtg. I stepped outside to take the call. When I returned to the mtg and told my teacher friend, I couldn’t stop the tears from exploding. I started crying bid tears making everyone uncomfortable. No one paid any attention to me. They just continued on with the mtg. I am grateful for that. Maybe baby was calm and unfazed. I felt like a huge weight has now burdened our family. Everything has changed and there is not one thing I could do to go back. I slept all weekend with sadness. I am better now. I knew it would come one day. I just didn’t think it would be so soon. I thought I had more time. I can see goofy town falling into the abyss of forgotten memories. My heart breaks for yesterday. It’s so unfair.

Playing 11u in Dallas. It’s so frustrating coming from an AMAZING 12u team to this sloppy green play . I need prayers to stay reserved and positive. Only God can help me with that. It’s only a game.

Have you ever had the foresight to know this is the moment everything changes. The beginning of the end. The last push over the edge. I see the irrational clearly. And there’s nothing you can do to set it right again. You take the brunt of the force and hope for the best. Give in and change too. Nothing willl be as it were. Deep sadness

There are days that fill you with heavy sadness. It’s all I can do to not cry in front of my girls, quickly brushing away tears that won’t stop. How do you explain your feelings to stones. How do you see passed the haze at your children that deserve so much more.